An Iowa Mom

I Blog ... Do You?

My friend and fellow blogger, Jody, is hosting the first ever "I Blog Conference".  Is that not an amazing idea?  A conference for us bloggers in the midwest.  Truly awesome!

The I_Blog conference will be held at the Hotel Pattee in Perry, Iowa November 14-15, 2009.  Speakers include Melanie from Blogging Basics 101, Darcy from Graphically Designing and BJ Weber from Ankeny Tax and Accounting.  They are planning plenty of fun as well and hope to bring together a community of amazing Iowa- and Midwest- bloggers.

Rooms must be booked by calling the Hotel Pattee 515-465-3511.  Be sure to mention that you are with I_Blog, iatraveler's group.  Double rooms are available for $99.  (Need a roommate?  Watch the website (www.iblogconference.com) for a forum to help find one.)  Special rates are available for single king rooms and suites, too.

Space is limited so register soon!

Are you going?  You should.  And be sure to let others know about it too!

Throwback - No. 1

Do you remember this summer when I never blogged?  Well, I did actually blog, because I specifically recall logging into this little platform thingy and writing that I was sorry I haven't blogged, I realize I'm a loser, and I was BACK.  Really, really back.  And then I wouldn't log in again for weeks.  I lied.  I admit it ... but, technically I DID blog this summer ... just sayin'.

Anyway, just because I didn't blog, doesn't mean that I didn't have things I could have blogged.  And I did keep track of some of those things.  See - I'm not as big a loser as you thought I was, huh?

One of the things I want to share with you, that you probably don't give a flyin' fart about, but this is my blog and I like to record some big things that happen in our lives, so we will always remember them ... and this is one of those things.

Jake, you know that kid of mine who is eleven years old now ... and I just can't believe that ... played baseball again last spring/summer.  He had a lot of fun and totally enjoyed himself last year.  The team was awesome and played so well together ... which is why they ended up in the STATE CHAMPIONSHIP GAME at the state tournament.

Yup, they did.

And while they lost that final game, just getting to that point is such an accomplishment for these boys who practice and try so hard.  I mean, 2nd place in the STATE is nothing to squawk at.  Ya know what I'm sayin'?

So, even though I'm four or five months late in saying it ... CONGRATULATIONS to Jake and the rest of the CR Hawks Black 11U Baseball Team for this memory that I'm sure you will always carry with you.  YOU GUYS ROCK!

As a family, we truly enjoyed attending all the games and Jake, we are so proud of your accomplishment!

It's The Little Things ...

Guess what I'm doing today?

Nothing.

That's right.  Nothing.  Nada.  Zero.  Zilch. 

I'm not driving anyone to school.

I'm not even getting out of my pajamas.

I'm not cleaning up the mess of toys in the living room.

I'm not going shopping.

I'm not answering the phone.

I'm not making more than a sandwich for lunch.

I may just not make more than a sandwich for dinner.

I'm not going to worry about anything.

I'm going to do what I want.  Watch what I want.  Read what I want.  Play what I want.

It's days like today that make life worth living.  Isn't it?

A Typical Monday

Monday was a "Teacher Inservice Day".  I don't know if you all have these in your district or not ... but we have a ton of them.  I know, I know ... they are important.  The teacher needs these days to prepare.  To learn.  To be the best they can be while teaching our kiddos.  But I think they are crap.  Probably because they always fall on Monday.  If they were on Wednesdays, I think I'd have a completely different opinion.  Just sayin'

Anyway, this is not about school.  Or teacher inservice days.  Or Wednesdays.  It's about Mondays.  Particularly this past Monday.

The day started just as any other day would ... only I was being jolted awake at 6:30am for NO REASON ... since the children didn't have school.  Apparently, my kids feel that school or no school, I should be up preparing their nutritious breakfast before the freakin' sun gets up.  Note to self:  Stock up on PopTarts.

I won't give you the details of the day, since it was a typical day and I can sum it up in one sentence.  My kids misbehaved, didn't listen to a word I said, drove me freakin' crazy and then I lost my mind.  Again.

There.

Fast forward to late afternoon.  I was preparing to get Emily ready for her soccer game, waiting for Big Daddy to come retrieve her.  Negotiations between her and I took place earlier that afternoon awarding me a "pass to opt out" of attending her event.  While I would have liked nothing else but to see 16 kindergartners running around in the rain and mud for an hour, I really needed to spend some time with my sewing machine since I was participating in the local "Fall Fest" craft show this weekend.  Keyword:  WAS.

So, there I was.  Organized.  Extra time before Big Daddy was to arrive.  I cracked open a beer to celebrate my accomplishment.  Tipped it up to my lips and took a nice, big, long swig ... and then the phone rang.

It seems as though Jake was playing football up the street with some friends and was now bleeding from his head.  Yup.  My neighbor informed me of this ... because they called HER rather than me.  Ya see, here in our neighborhood, we prefer to have the mothers of the non-injured kids run through the rain to tend to the injured children.  I mean, HELLO, the parent of the bleeding child was enjoying her celebratory beverage, she couldn't be bothered. 

I'm kidding.

Kinda.

The girls and I jumped in the car and headed five houses up the street ... where I found Jake laying on the stairs in the foyer, ON THEIR BRAND NEW CARPET, with a towel to his forehead.  Covered in blood.

Needless to say, I had to place a call to my sewing machine to reschedule our date ... because I would be sitting in the Urgent Care for the next 3 hours ... with beer on my breath ... while Jake got sewn up.   So technically there was sewing involved ... it just wasn't fabric.

To think we were nervous that Drew would get hurt playing football ... NA!  It was Jake.  And as it turns out, the gash in his head wasn't caused by playing the greatest game on earth.  Nope.  They were playing some version of hide and seek and he was hiding in front of a door.  Well, what do you know ... when you hide in front of a door and someone opens it ... you'll cut your head open.

Don't say I never taught you anything.  This blog is very educational. 

And yes, that is my sixth grade boy ... with a clippie in his hair ... and I posted it.  Because I'm mean like that.  Hey ... at least it matches his shirt.

Sorry for the long post.

I guess I could have just said, "Monday afternoon Jake had an accident and cut his head.  He needed 5 stitches."

Yeah, that would have probably been a lot easier.

Rough, Tough, Mean Drew!

Drew is able to play tackle football this year.  Remember? 

This is something Jake has always wanted to do this, but never weighed enough.  The poor kid is in 6th grade, almost twelve years old and only weighs 55 pounds.  But, he can watch his brother play, which I'm sure is humiliating  so much fun!

Anyway, this is about Drew ... not Jake ...

The 4th grade Prairie Hawks Black football team has practiced every single weeknight for the past 3 weeks and have played two games.  Won them both ... barely ... but a win is a win, right?

So, because I wanted to record this time in Drew's life, his first year playing tackle football, I pulled him out in the driveway and pointed my camera at him:

Of course this picture is insufficient, every mother wants pictures of her kid smiling ... so while the neighbors walked and allowed their dog to relieve itself on my tree, I hollered at Drew, "SMILE!  I need you to smile.  You're not smiling!!!"

"Mom ..." he groaned, "I'm a football player.  We are mean.  I can't smile!"

"We aren't going anywhere until you smile.  I need you to smile!"

Rolling his eyes ... this is what I get:

Better half-assed than nothing, right?  I'll take it.

Now, because I'm the wonderful mother that I am ... I don't want my rough, tough, mean football player, Drew, to forget 3 things that were said before a football practice last week.

1.  Walking in on Jake and Drew fighting over the remote control I have to yell, "Come on Jake, just let Drew watch the Care Bears movie before he has to leave for practice ... then you can watch whatever you want."

2.  The previous evening at practice Drew cut his leg really bad on a sharp piece of something on the bottom of the dummy his was tackling.  The wound would break open and bleed every time someone even looked at it cross-eyed, so I asked, "Do you want me to put a band-aid over that so that you don't bleed all over at practice?"  To which he responded with a quick, NO!"  After asking why, he informed me he didn't want the bandage because it "would hurt way too bad when we had to take it off".  Never mind the 4 inch gash in his leg ... a band-aid might pull some hair off when removed.  

3.  I asked Drew to just go outside and throw the ball around for a few minutes while I got things together for his practice.  He walked out the door only to return three minutes later.  "Drew?  Buddy ... please wait outside."  With a face as white as a ghost he responded, "No way!  I saw a bee out there!"

My rough, tough, mean ... sweet baby boy Drew ... the football player!

No Pictures, No Post!

I want to blog.  I really do.  There are things to share.  And my kiddos are actually cooperating and allowing me to write these down.  Type them into the computer so my friends inside the computer can roll their eyes and sigh as they think to themselves how dysfunctional our family is.

However, I can't.  I can't type those words describing our craziness into my lap top.  Why?  Because my mouse is broken.  Figuring out how to fix it has proved to be impossible for me.  So, I sit here on this dinosaur of a machine that can't display the letters on the screen nearly at the rate I'm pecking them ...

But that is not the reason I can't blog.  Obviously, I CAN blog ... because you are reading this ... however, I can't blog what I WANT to blog because the photos I want to use to accompany my words are on the laptop and I can't get the freakin' mouse to work. 

Get where I'm coming from now?  I mean, hello, I always use pictures to make my words more interesting ... or at least that's the strategy, and I will not tell the stories I have to tell ... without the pictures.

How do I fix my mouse?

It's a wireless one.  The little USB stick plugs into the computer and WA LA!  However, after changing the battery, reconnecting the mouse, rebooting the computer, throwing the mouse across the room at Big Daddy, drinking a couple beers, ignoring it all together figuring then it would pay attention to me, changing the battery again, rebooting the computer again ... and then getting a good night sleep ... I woke up and the stupid thing still won't respond.

What the heck? It's a mouse.  Not a man.

Any ideas?

I Feel Sorry For Her Husband

This morning my oldest daughter came bouncing in my bedroom (way too early, of course) to bombard me with the the trillions of birthday cards she had created for me over the last week and had hidden in her very secret, never to be talked about hiding place.

For a moment, seeing her excitement over what used to be described as my special day, but is just now known to me as September 14 ... that day I was born, made me think she changed her ways ... she was not turning this into an "all about her" moment, like usual.  And then she spoke.  In the most loving, sweet, kind voice...

"Mommy?  I'm so glad I could give you your birthday wish."

I looked at her wondering how she knew I was hoping I'd walk downstairs and discover that Big Daddy had installed wood floors throughout the entire main living area while I slept.  And then she continued ...

"Your wish came true.  You get to watch ME play soccer tonight."

And yes, ME was emphasized.